< UK Housewives  

• Lizzie Anne as Lizzy Ann

Running time: 109 mins.

Television X have entered the world of the amateur with their film UK Housewives, allowing five girls to strut their stuff.

Mandy lies in a rather dull looking bedroom, reading a book. The story makes her feel horny so she reaches under the pillows for her toys. Slipping down her red knickers, she starts with a pink plastic vibe then progresses to a set of beads. Mandy tugs at her tits as a cock arrives. The flaccid dick goes straight into her mouth to prepare it for action. Dropping onto all fours, the camera takes time to follow the action. Mandy turns onto her back to get fucked missionary. Grabbing the guy's cock, Mandy jerks away for a good three or four minutes and is eventually rewarded with a mouth full of jizz.

In a short buttoned skirt, fishnet stockings and black veiled hat, Lizzy Anne relaxes on the settee. Picking up a knobbly glass toy, she parts her legs and eases it past her black panties into her hairy muff. Lizzy Anne sucks at a second glass rod and squeezes it into her pussy to join the first. Turning round, she sinks the glass toy deep into her snatch. Her fingers rub hard at her pierced clit. Twisting round on the sofa, Lizzy Anne hammers away with the toy till she orgasms.

In black negligee and stockings, Joan opens the door to collect a parcel from the postman. She invites him into the kitchen where she starts to tease with the contents of her fruit bowl. Peeling off her knickers, Joan feeds a banana into her pussy and invites the postman to eat it. Kneeling on the kitchen stool, Joan pops a carrot into her snatch. Pouring lube over her bum, the postie inserts a second into her arse. Stripping down to her stockings, Joan wants to see if the mail man can really deliver. His cock out, she starts sucking. Smearing lube onto his cheb, Joan mounts him, moving him from her pussy to her bum. A quick wank and blow job and the mail man is done.

Dragging a guy into her room, Suzie throws him onto the bed and tumbles on top. Slipping her boobs out from her black spotted dress, the guy sucks at Suzie's nipples till they're hard. Shirt and pants undone, Suzie starts on his cock. Swinging her legs over his head, the two 69. Her dress yanked down, the guy glides his prick into Suzie's pussy. She rolls to be taken on all fours. A little more missionary and the guy gives Suzie a facial.

Pauline sits on the sofa licking a lolly. Lifting up her blue dress, she pops it into her bald snatch. The cameraman throws over a cigar which she lights and holds against her pussy. Fingering her sticky slot, Pauline is waiting for cock. The cameraman obliges. Her tongue flicks over the head of his big black dick, but as the cameraman holds Pauline's head she almost loses her black wig! Down on all fours, her belly sags as Pauline is fucked doggy style. She sits up to give a blow job and is rewarded with a mouthful of cream.

Of the five scenes, only Lizzy Anne's appears to be competently shot, with the remainder either too light, or too dark, with jerky camera movement and bits out of focus. If you're expecting glamorous girls and slick production you'll be disappointed. But if you've ever wondered what goes on down your street with 'real women' this may be the film for you.

Review by Dawn "Hot Totty" Birtle