Running time: 118 mins. (plus 26 min. bonus scene)
With only hours before shooting starts on her second film, director Wendy Stevenson receives a bombshell; the studio she has booked is unavailable. The first ten minutes of the movie are then taken up with Wendy and the host of her new game show, Wendy Taylor, frantically scouring Hertfordshire for a suitable alternative. With nothing available, the cast and crew are sent to Wendy's house to make do with what they can find. Not a good omen at the start of Porn Date.
In a 'make do' green room, Sandie Caine chats with Porn Date researcher Keeley about tactics and tips on winning. Pulling down Keeley's top and undoing her bra, Sandie thinks a little girl-on-girl warm up session may help. Undoing Keeley's jeans, Sandie spots a damp patch in her panties and starts to lick. She slips in a finger or two. The girls kiss. Keeley's hand finds Sandie's pussy, but she hardly has time to start playing before being called on set.
With Sahara sitting in one room and Ben, Keni and Sensi in the other, host Wendy does the introductions. Three questions having been asked of her, Sahara has to choose and it's Ben who is going to the bedroom with her. Slipping his hand inside Sahara's black dress, Ben drops to his knees to eat muff. The two tumble around on the bed as Sahara's knickers come down. She turns to take Ben's shaft in her mouth. The black dress off, Sahara is propped up on a pillow. Ben pushes his prick between her legs. Falling on to their sides, the pair keep shagging. Sahara takes control of the situation, straddling Ben's rod and riding him reverse. With her hair fanned out across the bed, Sahara sticks her bum high in the air. Ben hammers into her pussy. Ready to cum, he jerks his jizz over Sahara's face.
Danny is the next contender who has to choose. Is it Alicia or Sandie? It's Alicia and the pair head off upstairs. Pulling at her boobs, Danny buries his face in Alicia's cleavage, then moves to lick and bite at her nipples. Alicia pushes him back on the bed. Her red dress riding up, she rubs herself against his crotch. Panties off, Danny laps at Alicia's pussy as she lies with her legs outstretched. Holding his balls, Alicia's lips work their way along Danny's shaft. The two 69 then move through various positions. A second cock comes into view. Has someone phoned a friend? Warren bangs away at Alicia's pussy as she gags on Danny's cock. Down on all fours, the boys change ends. Warren wanks his load over Alicia's back and Danny coats her tongue.
What's happened to the unsuccessful candidates? Back in the green room, Sandie finds herself alone with Keni and Sensi. With two guys to herself she's a winner! The boys ease her tits out of her white dress and pop their fingers into Sandie's panties. Pulling out their pricks, she starts to suck. First she fills her mouth with Sensi's shaft, then with Keni's. Rubbered up, Sensi sits Sandie on his dick, then he takes her doggy. Keni lets her ride his cock as she swallows Sensi's length. The boys bang away, then empty their balls over Sandie's face.
The bonus scene is the one that got away. Keira sits wedged in the corner of Wendy's sofa, wearing a sexy black number and fishnet stockings. With his cock out, Kieran is there to assist with the audition. Keira takes him deep into her mouth and parts her legs so he can play with her pussy. Strings of saliva dribble from her chin as she sucks. Kieran's cock is shiny with spit. Keira slides it into her pussy then flops back. She grabs at his balls as he thrusts in hard. Her boobs jolt out of her black basque. The couple bang away, cowgirl and spoons. Keira stands to be filled from behind. More thrusting cowgirl and it's a face full of cum for Keira.
Abysmally lit and badly staged, the warning signs are there from the start with a ten minute excuse from director Wendy. Mimicking Blind Date would have been okay if it was a clever parody, or an outrageous tongue-in-cheek production. But Porn Date does neither of those things, leaving Wendy Taylor and the cast floundering as they try to work out how to make the best of a bad situation. Shop Secrets was a good start for Wendy Stevenson, but with Porn Date she's come down to earth with a thud. Avoid.
Review by Dawn "Hot Totty" Birtle |