< Happy Birthday  

• Bonnie Heart as Charlie
• Kat Varga as Katalina

Running time: 91 mins.

Kat, who is at home on her bed, phones a friend for company. He's busy so she pleasures herself with a small dildo.

Mark Sloan is soaking off a slight stiffness in the bath when partner Bonnie enters. Bonnie joins him in the bath, inflaming the stiffness and gets shagged all around the bathroom. The scene ends with Mark coming (massively) over Bonnie's tits.

In the next scene Mark is a policeman looking for stolen sex toys. Mark arrives at Bonnie's flat to search, but only finds toys belonging to Kat (dressed as a maid). Kat shows the toys are definitely hers with a series of very sexy gyrations as she strips off. Bonnie joins her with a strap-on and after some girl-girl action Mark joins in to get his cock sucked, but after the bathroom scene cannot climax.

Kat is asleep in her bed with Mark, who wakes her for sex. This is straightforward, but there is no cumshot.

Now both Kat and Mark are asleep and it's Kat who wakes and fondles Mark when Bonnie walks in. A threesome follows which ends in a very weak joint facial for the women. Kat possibly gets her bum fucked in missionary position, but the camerawork is unclear and the lighting poor, although the scene is entitled Anal.

This whole programme looks like it was shot quickly in a single afternoon in a small flat. The lighting is generally poor and the camerawork unclear and, of course, Mark can only manage one decent money shot. Shooting in the confined space of a bathroom is always difficult; here there are no clear penetration shots at all, although watching Bonnie pressed up against the shower glass was quite erotic.

Both Kat and Bonnie now have a large body of work available elsewhere and this is not their best. One for diehard fans only.

Review by Bayleaf

Dawn "Hot Totty" Birtle's view:

Having been disappointed with Rude Britannia's recent releases, I've decided to watch a 'lesser known' film from a time when they dominated the market. Happy Birthday was released in 2002 and comes from Rude Britannia's heyday. Unusually, this five scene film has a very small cast of only 3. Bonnie Heart and Kat, with Mark Sloane as the stud.

Kat sits on the bed in her black negligee, stroking her pussy as she talks on the phone. Slowly she strips, running her fingers over her body. Reaching into the bedside drawer, she finds a vibrator and wanks her way to the end of the scene.

Mark is relaxing in the bath when Bonnie enters. To relieve the tensions of the day, she massages his aching muscles. Bonnie's fingers soon find their way to his cock. Climbing into the bath, she gives mark a blow job then turns to sit on his face. With her boobs squashed against the shower screen, Bonnie is banged from behind. Dripping, Bonnie mounts Mark as he sits on the edge of the bath. She falls forward over the hand basin to be taken doggy. Mark empties his balls over Bonnie's body.

Turning up at Bonnie's flat, Mark finds maid Kat with a toy in her pussy. Slipping out of her black uniform, she eases some love beads into her arse. Bonnie quietly watches from the sofa, her hand inside her black panties. Kat moves over to join her. Peeling off Bonnie's black dress, Kat laps at her pert breasts. She works her way towards her pussy and buries her tongue. Donning a strap-on, Bonnie gets Kat to lick at the black rubber dick before fucking her doggy. Mark has had enough of standing on the sidelines and gives his cock up for the two girls to suck. The pair lick their way along his shaft. Mark jerks his load into Bonnie's mouth. The girls kiss.

Kat is lying under the duvet when Mark comes into the bedroom. Pulling back the covers, she reveals her white lingerie. Grabbing his dick, Kat sits up and sucks, taking him deeper and deeper into her mouth. Mark bends to lap at the damp patch in her panties. His tongue works its way past her crotch, exploring each fold and crease. Stretched out on the bed, Kat is fucked missionary. She climbs onto Mark's cock as the session progresses. The scene ends with Kat on all fours, but finishes without a pop shot.

Bonnie climbs into bed beside Kat and Mark. She places the tip of his dick against her lips and licks. Giving way to Kat on the cock, Bonnie positions herself over Mark's face. Removing her red knickers, Kat guides Mark's member into her cunt. He swaps girls, shagging Bonnie doggy style up the bum. Kat is also up for some anal action. Mark bangs in hard. The girls jerks away at Mark's cock but he only manages a few drops of jizz for their faces.

I have to admit Happy Birthday is a poor film. The camera work is off, as is the lighting, especially in the third scene. Parts of the film appear to be 'spiced up' softcore stuff. Perhaps the only good part is Bonnie pressed against the shower screen. Judging by this film, I appear to have been wearing rose coloured glasses when thinking of Rude Britannia in their prime. Their films haven't got worse over the years... Everyone else has just got a lot better.