< Fat Fucker 

• Ashley [6]
• Ashley Long
• Bonnie Heart
• Mischa
• Sascha

Running time: 104 mins.

The Fat Fucker must be one of the strangest porn stars around. Overweight in skin tight leather trousers with medallion and frizzy afro wig, he has one of the smallest cocks you have seen in a film. He is also hilarious, with some great one liners.

Scene 1 takes place in a pub where Fat Fucker works as a topless barman, but is spending most of his time trying to get into the knickers of identical blonde twins Sascha and Mischa. The girls are having nothing to do with Fat Fucker and fortunately Demitri(?) comes to save them from the pest. To show their appreciation they give him a blow job before he starts licking their pussies. To tell the difference in the twins Sascha is wearing red knickers and Mischa purple, or is that the other way round? Anyway, both get a good sucking and fucking in various positions before Demitri fires his load into Mischa's (or Sascha's) pussy. The scene ends with a loud fanny fart as the jizz dribbles out of one of the twins.

Scene 2 starts with Ashley Long in a black see through dress letting Fat Fucker into a large house. Apparently he is the male escort she ordered. "I could have parked my bike in that arse" Fat Fucker comments as he follows Ashley into the room. After running through what he can and cannot do with his 5 inches the pair are just about to get started when Demitri (Ashley's husband) arrives home. Fat fucker hides behind a curtain to watch Ashley first take Demitri in her mouth then in her pussy. Whilst doing Ashley doggie style, Demitri comes over her bum and then re-enters her pussy where he pounds away until he fires again. He leaves the room and Fat Fucker returns from behind the curtain, cock in hand. Ashley obliges with a blow job, he fills her mouth with cum just as Demitri walks back in the room. "Must be the wrong house" he says as he runs out the door.

Scene 3 sees Fat Fucker being interviewed for a job as a French maid, but only after he has threatened to sue the house owner. Before the interview starts the owner is called away, at the same time Bonnie Heart dressed in a cropped black bra top and short skirt turns up to be interviewed. Fat Fucker takes his chance and soon has Bonnie out of her knickers. He just starts work on her pussy with "Not a lot of girls can take the full 5 inches" when the house owner returns. Fat Fucker is off. The owner takes over where Fat Fucker left off, first in Bonnie's pussy before filling her arse full of cock in various positions. The scene ends with a pop shot aimed at the mouth. Bonnie looks nice with facial cream pack.

In scene 4 we are back at the pub where Fat Fucker is left in charge for a short time. Melissa turns up wearing a long clinging charcoal grey lurex dress to complain, she twisted her ankle the previous day in the pub. Fat Fucker claims to be the multimillionaire owner of the place and medically qualified to check Melissa over. Licking her pussy doesn't appear to cure her ankle so he suggests she sucks on his cock to get better. Just then the boss returns. Fat Fucker makes his excuses and leaves allowing the boss to finish the work he started. Melissa, who has two large scars left over from breast enlargement, takes it in the pussy on a bar table before having her mouth filled with cream.

The last scene also takes place in the pub. Sascha and Mischa wearing matching white blouses and short tartan skirts turn up to get fucked by the barman. Both girls get well sucked and fucked in what is virtually a rerun of the first scene, though with a different man. The scene ends with the twins taking a load over their faces.

This is one of the funniest porn films I have seen with some stunning girls and guys (Fat Fucker excepted). The only criticism I have is the sound in the pub scenes is a little lacking, though as Sascha and Mischa don't speak much English we're probably not missing that much. The only other gripe is the DVD copy has an irritating menu in the corner for those who want to jump straight to the cumshot. If you can put up with this, Fat Fucker is a great film.

Review by Dawn "Hot Totty" Birtle