Just a few years back, Rude Britannia were releasing well produced Britporn featuring top girls, filmed by the likes of John Mason and Daren Morgan. Today their films are almost entirely populated by pro-am models, filmed by people with virtually no knowledge at all of how to make a video. Particularly depressing is the inability of the cameramen/director to learn from previous mistakes. So the abysmal 'Tony Goodfellow' continues to make films that border on the unwatchable. The locations are too dark and too cramped, so the performers and the cameramen are falling over each other as six or seven bodies squeeze into a small bedroom. And while the automatic exposure meter on the camcorder takes its level from the old sheet thrown over the window, the underexposed four-way action on the bed has all the sexual tension of Malayan shadow puppets. Wires, cameraman's feet, arms and shadows all stray into shot. Although the film runs for over two hours, there are just three scenes, all of which could be edited down.
Experienced swingers Vinny (Bones/Richard Hardwood) and wife Donna lead proceedings at what could well be their house. Whoever's house it is, it ain't any good for porn. Nice white walls and ceilings, hard flooring, upholstered furniture and enough room to swing a cat are required. The tangerine walls, with Polyfilla smudging ain't.
As for the action... Well, Vinny and Donna have Rob (aka porn stud Merlin) round with girlfriend Tracey. While the hosts make a cup of tea, Rob and Tracey sneak off to the bedroom. Naturally they are discovered and all four strip on the bed (Tracey keeps her black hold-ups on). The couples fuck side by side, keeping pretty separate throughout. The scene ends with the guys depositing their loads over their partners' pussies.
The second scene opens with Donna and Vinny, and Lindsey and Steve, kissing in the sitting room before moving to the bedroom. They undress and fuck side-by-side. Space is limited, but the couples achieve most positions before they swap partners and start again. Despite their proximity there is (once again) little contact between the couples, who swap back so that Vinny can shoot over Donna's pert bum and Steve over Lindsey's big belly.
The third and longest scene kicks off with Donna sucking Toni's tits in a sitting room. The women undress and use vibrators on each other, while the guys watch and stroke their cocks. As everyone undresses, the women suck their partner's cocks. Then they fuck on the floor, eventually swapping partners as the guys rubber-up. The women continue to touch each other throughout as they're fucked side-by-side doggy, missionary and cowgirl. Vinny delivers an enormous load over Donna's pussy, then the women 69 while Simon fucks Toni doggy style, cumming over her bum.
Now, although I rate this as a two out of ten, I should mention Tracey. If you have a particular weakness (like me) for natural redheads with trimmed ginger muffs, who are tall with excellent large firm tits, there is absolutely no reason not to acquire this film. Otherwise, give it a miss.
Review by Bayleaf