Running time: 90 mins.
When it comes to quality British pictures, Rude Britannia have slipped well down the pecking order and are now languishing near the bottom. Unfortunately, their latest offering, Dirty Dave's Whorehouse, does nothing to stop the slide. With just over an hour of 'new' material, the film has been padded by lifting a scene from Smoking Hot: Only Girls Allowed which was released only a couple of months ago!!!
Sitting at his desk, Dirty Dave takes his first booking. A guy in a hotel is looking for two young girls. Charlie and Melissa will fit the bill nicely. A sudden jump and the girls are already partly stripped, kneeling either side of a bloke, kissing. They undo the guy's belt and his prick pops out from under his pot belly. He lies like a beached whale as first Charlie, then Melissa, lick his dick. His hands explore the girls' bodies, finding Melissa's fanny. But he seems far happier tugging at his own todger till he cums.
In a black top, jeans and with a string of beads around her neck, Melissa leads a guy to the sofa. Unzipping his trousers, she sets straight to work sucking his cock. A series of jump cuts sees Melissa's top, bra and pants disappear. A little fingering and it's back to the blow job. Climbing onto the guy's cock, Melissa starts to ride. The camera pulls back to show a tatty hardboard wall. Looking less than impressed with the action, Melissa is fucked missionary and doggy before lying on the sofa to be finished spoons. Ready to cum, the guy coats Melissa's tits.
Layla is called in for a two-man job. In a shabby studio, she sits on one fella's back massaging his shoulders. He turns so she can do his chest and gropes her tits in the process. The boys lift Layla's black leather miniskirt to give her a good fingering. Layla responds by swallowing their cocks. Stripped to her panties and stockings, her pussy gets a good finger pounding in preparation for some prick. The camera wobbles and joggles around the action as Layla is spit-roasted and her arse probed. The remainder of the scene is a mix of doggy penetration and spit-roasting, broken up with some pussy play. Attempting to jerk his jizz over Layla's face, one guy misses completely, cumming on her armpit. The second plays safe and aims his load at her tits.
The last scene with Jas aka Lauren Cox and Melissa is lifted straight from Smoking Hot: Only Girls Allowed.
I would like to say something nice about this film... Unfortunately, there's nothing good to say about it. The scene introductions, with Dave tapping away on his computer, answering the phone and sending text massages, are interminable and add nothing to the film (but length). The camera work is wobbly and at times out of focus and the girls look bored with the whole affair. If you're considering buying this, think again. There are a lot better films on the shelf for the same price.
Review by Dawn "Hot Totty" Birtle